McRIB SEASON

It’s that time of year again… No, not the holidays (yet).

The time of year when it becomes sooooo tempting to pull up to the Mickey D’s drive thru for a delectable classic: the McRib.

Yes, indeed, the McRib is back. And BBQ purists (us) everywhere are allowed to be tempted, but we should also be pushing for better…

Honestly, it’s only back for a limited time anyway, and only in select cities like Los Angeles, Chicago, Miami, Atlanta, and Dallas.

And look, we get the appeal. Sauce, pickles, onions, a soft roll. Nostalgia is a hell of a seasoning. But let’s be honest… it’s a boneless pork patty pressed into the shape of a rib.

But we’re the Dead Meat Society. We don’t chase a sandwich shaped like ribs. We make one out of actual ribs.

MEET THE McROB

The crew at Barbecue Bible asked the obvious question: What if you built a McRib out of real smoked rib meat… minus the bones?

They call it the McRob, and the method is exactly what you came to the DMS for. A few highlights in case you aren’t a rib expert yet:

  • Pull the membrane off the back first. (Anyone wanna argue this in the comments?)

  • On a full rack, cut a slit down each side of the bones before it goes on.

  • Smoke at 225 to 250 over hickory, about 2 hours for small cuts and closer to 4 for a full rack.

  • Finish it covered (a pan with butter, brown sugar, and beer, or a tight foil wrap) until the bones slide right out.

And before you rib guys stand up and complain, yes, we’re overcooking these ribs. On purpose. Barbecue Bible’s exact words: “Overcook them!” It’s the one time falling off the bone is on purpose.

From there, keep the meat in one rib-shaped slab, give it a sauce bath, and stack it on a long roll with sliced onions and pickles. Fun fact: the sauce that gets closest to the original is Sweet Baby Ray’s. (So Zuck would be proud.)

But you can probably do better than that (“be better” is the idea here).

KNOW YOUR RACK

Before you hit the meat counter, know what you’re grabbing. Our own CMO (Chief Meat Officer, obviously) broke it all down in Pork Ribs 101.

The short version: baby backs come off the top of the rib cage, so they’re leaner and cook faster. Spares come off the belly side, so they’re bigger, fattier, and built for flavor. St. Louis cut is just a spare trimmed into a clean rectangle.

Whichever you pick, they’re done around 195 to 203 internal, plus the bend test.

SKIP THE DRIVE-THRU

The McRib will disappear again. It always does.

Real ribs don’t have a press release and a drive thru. They’re sitting at the meat counter every single day, waiting for someone with a smoker and a free Saturday to love them.

So this weekend, let’s all make it real. Smoke a rack, pull the bones, build your McRob, and post it in the Facebook group so the rest of us can judge.

Need a rib plan? Keep scrolling down to the recipes. Our CMO’s 3-1-1 spare ribs are waiting for you…